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Today sucks quite a lot.

It's Lewis's funeral today. I don't quite know what's "right" to say about a funeral, but I hope everyone is ok.

I wanted to make an effort with my dad today. I'd planned to meet him at the shopping centre so I could get him a Father's Day present seeing as I had no money when it was actually Father's Day. Well, he complained because he asked for something I couldn't afford. Then he picked a CD set thing that he wanted, I bought it and he asked for the reciept. So he's blatantly going to copy the CDs, then take it back for a refund. As soon as i'd given them to him, he said "Right, I'm off home, see you later". Nice.

I always say i'm never going to do anything for him again because of things like this, but I still do because I feel I should. Because I'm not a bad person and I'm not a bad daughter. But times like this make me wish I didn't bother. I know he'll be straight on the phone to his "girlfriend" telling her all he got was a set of CDs for Father's Day. Nothing I do will ever be good enough and the sooner I realise that, the better.

Me and Kayleigh took Bethany to softplay this afternoon. She met a friend and they followed eachother around. The little girl was adorable, telling us her mum was the one "over there wearing a green top, she's a little bit different" haha. It was so cute. Bethany pulled a boys t-shirt and the little girl told her if she said sorry Bethany might even be able to go to her house, if her mammy lets her.

My mum was taken into hospital last night too. Nobody thought to tell me though. I only found out today because my nanna was mad about it. She'd stayed up til 3am this morning waiting to find out how she was but nobody rang her so she went to bed. Then she found out this morning that my mum is at work today, yet her husband is in bed with a migrane.

My clothes that I ordered for my birthday nights out came today. I'm pretty gutted that they all look disgusting. The one I was most looking forward to makes me boobs look enormous. Which they're not. It doesn't look right at all. And the others just look dreadful. Totally makes the fact that i've lost 5lbs in a week seem pointless. Mehhh.